60 years is a long, long time

This past weekend was a really special one for my mom's family. We all gathered from near and far to celebrate my grandparents 60th wedding anniversary. While gathered, we also celebrated my cousin Kristen's bridal shower. The timing was appropriate since it is rare that we're all able to get together in the same place at the same time. But it was also significant to celebrate the beginning of one marriage while acknowledging the longevity of another.

My grandparents met when they were young. Very young. My grandmother was best friends with my grandfather's younger sister. They met young and developed an interest in one another. They managed to hold off their relationship until she was of age and they were married when she was 18. This is astounding to me because I can't imagine doing anything significant when I was 18 - let alone getting married to someone I could STAY married to for 60 years!

In their first 3 years of marriage, they had three children: Bill, Dick and my mother. Wow. When I was 21 I could barely feed myself let alone take care of 3 kids and a husband. They would go on to have 3 more sons Mike, Bob and Ken. Those children have now produced 9 grandchildren and 7 (and a half) great-grandchildren.

My grandparents still sign their cards to each other "Love, Babe". As children, we used to giggle about that. Now, I appreciate it a lot more.

It's been a rough few weeks for them. My grandmother had a back surgery that led to a chain of events culminating with her in the hospital - including an ICU stay. Thankfully, she is now recovering in a rehab facility. It's been stressful for her and my grandfather. But seeing them arrive together at the dinner in their honor yesterday put it all into perspective. It takes work to be in a marriage. It takes work to raise children. And after 60 years, they still are very much in love and they are very much a team.

Having a relationship like that to look up to instills a certain amount of hope in me. I hope that Brian and I can be so happy when we hit our 6th anniversary! But joking aside, I also know, after watching my grandparents for so many years, that it won't be easy but that we'll GET THROUGH. We just have to want to. So thank you Grandma and Grandpa, for setting such a shining example for all of us.

Wow - someone is reading!

I've taken a sick day from work today to recover from all the weekend activities and medical issues, and noticed something special in my Google Reader. The lovely Goddess in Progress sent me a little love.
Thanks! I needed that!

The rules as I understand are to pass the love along. To be clear, I'll send the love right back in her direction, but her are some other worthy recipients. Check them out!

• LaLaGirl - a follow HDYDI mommy and my current inspiration. While I am sweating having a singleton so close to my twins, this girl had twins and then more twins in the same time frame. Not to mention she has an older daughter as well. And still finds the time to blog on several sites and write product reviews, etc, etc.
• threeundertwo - like LaLaGirl, she is another member of the 3 children under 2 club (hence her name!). Her children are older than mine so it gives me something to look forward to. I love her writing style and the fact that her son is excelling in ballet.
• Scott - While the frequency of posts is down a little bit, it's for good reason. Colby is a busy boy and he's keeping his parents equally busy. Their's is such an amazing story - I literally get goosebumps every time I read about what Colby is up to.
• Nathan - alright, if you find Colby's story inspiring, you need to be reading the story that Nathan is telling over on Confessions of a CF Husband. I stumbled across this blog one day last month and was so intrigued, I went back and spent my lunch hour (and a little more) reading EVERY past post to catch up. Amazing, awesome stuff.
• Okay, well, keeping with the Dads out there that I'm reading let's give a shout out to Be a Good Dad, Child Play x2, and The Dad. It's nice to get perspective from the "other side". I find that even though I don't know these men, I relate better to my own husband's daddy-skills after reading what they have to say.
• Krissy - Another HDYDI mom. Krissy has a habit of writing posts to her children and every time I read one, I cry.
• CarrieinAK - Like me, Carrie has Boy/Boy identical twins and they are adorable! I love that Carrie posts SO MANY adorable photos of them. Set against the backdrop of beautiful Alaska, I can't get enough!
• Heather - My very talented friend from high school. I could look at her photos all day long. She's been known to work wonders with cranky twins too....
  

Help!

This blog needs a new look. In particular we need a banner that sums up what's going on here. Anyone out there want to take a crack at designing something?

June 3 is Be a Hero for Babies day

Tuesday, June 3 is Be a Hero for Babies day! Visit www.marchofdimes.com/farmers on June 3 to donate to the March of Dimes! Farmers has a goal of raising $2 million in one day, and if you donate through this website, your donation will be matched by Farmers (up to $250,000).

Across the country, Farmers Insurance customers, family and friends like you participate as sponsors and volunteers to make sure all babies get a healthy start in life. Your support helps March of Dimes researchers, educators, outreach workers and advocates give all babies a fighting chance against prematurity, birth defects, low birthweight and other threats to their health.

Farmers has an outstanding record of volunteer service, contributing time, energy, talent and financial resources to helping babies. Thank you for being a "Hero for Babies" and supporting the important work of the March of Dimes. Farmers Insurance Group will match it dollar for dollar up to $250,000.

*On June 3, please donate at this address:
www.marchofdimes.com/farmers

Josh Groban is Beautiful

MBFJG was named one of People Magazine's 100 Most Beautiful People!

At this time I'd like to send a big "I told you so" to my husband. Clearly other people agree that his "dorky" look IS appealing. Especially when paired with a voice like Josh's.

This never happens to me

As I have mentioned, I have no maternity clothes left from my previous pregnancies. So, I've been starting over (and, admittedly, I'm NOT sad about it!). So when I found this site that sells adorable t-shirts - www.CafePress.com - I promptly ordered one.

I waivered back and forth between a medium and a large. At the last moment, I went with the large to give myself room to grow. I was so excited to receive my t-shirt until I saw it was microscopic in size. Seriously, the smallest size L maternity t-shirt ever known to man arrived at my door.

But it's still adorable so I went back to www.CafePress.com to find out how to exchange this thing for the XL (grrr....). I filled out the online form and I PROMPTLY received THIS reply:

"Dear Cynthia,
I am sorry the item you received does not fit perfectly. I want you to be 100% satisfied with everything you purchase at CafePress.com. I am ordering you a replacement right away in the new size at no additional charge.

There is no need for a return! I do not want you to incur any additional shipping charges. Please keep the original as our way of saying thanks for shopping at CafePress.com.

If there is anything else I can do for you please let me know."

What? Are they serious? I can't tell you how this little email about a T-SHIRT just brightened my gloomy, rainy day. Needless to say I'll be bookmarking www.CafePress.com and using it in the future for all my cute t-shirt needs. And you should too. Just remember to order a size bigger than you think you should!

2008 March for Babies

This past Saturday our family participated in the 2008 March of Dimes March for Babies. This was my 3rd year as an individual and our second year as a team. We had a beautiful, sunny day in New England and everyone was feeling good. Most importantly, our team raised JUST under $1500 for the cause which is great! It's not too late to help us beat our 2008 goal; just click the March for Babies badge on the right side of this page and make a little donation today. Even $5 can help.

Here are a few pictures of our day (our team picture will be posted soon...hint, hint to email it to me LIZ!!)

Questions Answered

As expected my announcement from earlier today has produced many questions. Let me attempt to answer the big ones in one shot:

1 - It is just ONE baby. Keeping in mind that Aaron and Brady are identical twins, here's how the odds looked walking into the ultrasound appointment:

Chances of Having Two Sets of Twins
(w/ various zygosity combinations)
2 sets of fraternal twins 1 in 3,000
1 set of fraternal twins/1 set of identical twins 1 in 10,000
2 sets of identical twins 1 in 70,000
[Stats borrowed from CarrieinAK. I'm glad she had already figured this out so I didn't have to!]

2 - Yes, we will find out the sex. Alaina has been asking for a sister since the boys were born. If this baby is a boy, we'll need the time to prep her.

3 - No, we are not all set with clothes. I have already sold or given away all of my maternity clothes, along with the preemie/newborn clothes, and anything else that the children have already grown out of. But we do still have almost of our non-clothing baby gear so that is a HUGE bonus.

4 - I do not know if I will need a repeat C-Section. Time will tell. Dr M assured me that VBAC is absolutely an option. But, as I will be delivering in Massachusetts this time, I will need to switch OB/Gyn's in the very near future (Dr. M delivers at hospitals too far away). We will see what the new practice has to say.

5 - This pregnancy will be no different than the other two in that the name will be kept a secret until I've delivered. Ask all you want, you won't get an answer!

Seven Random Things

Since I was tagged, here goes...
Seven random things about me:

1. My first (and only) band experience was when I played the triangle in the Rhythm Band at Our Lady of Hope school. I used to be sad that I didn't get promoted to the cymbol or the tamborine when I moved from Kindergarten to First Grade. Now I realize that it was because I was SO GOOD at the triangle, that section couldn't bear to lose me.
2. I am terribly claustrophobic. This means I cannot sleep with socks on, I select flights/airlines based on the seating configurations, and I watch how many people get on an elevator before deciding whether or not I will also get on.
3. I have given birth naturally without pain medication (and speak of the experience in positive terms) but I need to take an anxiety pill and all available numbing options when getting a cleaning at the dentist.
4. I suffered from a lazy eye during childhood which was corrected by wearing a patch. In college I was in a car accident that resulted in, essentially, two lazy eyes. My eyes are about 20-20 seperately but do not play nicely together.
5. I actually enjoy watching the Doodlebops with Alaina, but I get really excited when they are followed by an episode of "This is Emily Yeung." That kid ROCKS. "This is Daniel Cook" is simply not the same.
6. I didn't get on an airplane until I was 24 years old. (I went to Aruba, in case that is important).
7. I changed my mind about which college to attend at the 11th hour… based on the weather. Every time we toured a school it was either raining or snowing. But when we went to Sacred Heart, it was a beautiful sunny day. I took that as a sign it was meant to be.

We can't please everyone

In a former life, I used to manage a pay-per-click advertising campaign for my employer. As a result, I'm fairly addicted to things like Google Analytics, even for this little blog I have going here. I'm always curious to see what keywords are bringing people in. No surprise, there are many pregnancy-related terms but there are some more random things as well. One of my biggest traffic weeks came after I posted about Thomas the Tank Engine. Another heavy week came after the Doodlebops post.

But by far, the strangest search term came this week. While it didn't generate much traffic, it sure generated a good laugh on my end:
"adult boys in pooped diapers.com"

I can't make this stuff up people.

I'll Be Lovin' You Forever

Several things have truly made me feel my age of late. Without getting into a "poor Cynthia" type of rant here, I will focus on the thing which struck me closest to my heart: the newly announced New Kids on the Block reunion. This had me excited. But now, it has me feeling over the hill.

To start with, I was at the mall two (or so) weeks ago and the pre-teen walking in front of me had an old NKTOB "Hangin' Tough" t-shirt on.Knowing this girl may not even have been BORN when that album was released, it hit me hard: one of my favorite Jr. High School bands is now RETRO. Ugh.

And speaking of Hangin' Tough, when was the last time you've listened - truly listened - to that song? Thanks to radio pretending the "original boy band" never existed until very recently and having lost all my old tapes (yes, tapes, not CDs) it's been a while for me. So, when the reunion was announced I hit the iTunes store and purchased some old faves. When Hangin' Tough came on in the Drive Home shuffle the other night I found myself dancing in the driver's seat. Even with the soccer whistles and the ridiculous lyrics ("WE'RE ROUGH"??? Come on...!) it's still a damn catchy tune. Even better was "You've Got It (The Right Stuff)". All that I needed was YOU New Kids.

Will I go to see the reunion tour? Perhaps. I've become a bit of a snob in my old age and I'm torn. On the one hand the thought of spending an evening bumping into a bunch of crazy, screaming, 30-something women, all hoping against hope to meet a New Kid makes me want to poke my eyes out with a pen. But, on the flip side, I never had the opportunity to see them in my youth (much too young to go alone and not willing to go with a parent). So, it would be cool. I have to admit, they have aged well. I guess it will be up to my friends (ahem, you know which ones you are) to help me decide.

Bumper sticker of the week:

"I bet Jesus would use his turn signal."

Thanks, Chuck

Here is yet another reason why I will never step foot into a Chuck E. Cheese if I can possibly help it:
Chuck E. Cheese Birthday Marred by Brawling Moms

Not So Identical After All?

Identical twins not as identical as believed from PhysOrg.com

Contrary to our previous beliefs, identical twins are not genetically identical. This surprising finding is presented by American, Swedish, and Dutch scientists in a study being published today in the prestigious journal American Journal of Human Genetics. The finding may be of great significance for research on hereditary diseases and for the development of new diagnostic methods.

[...]

Congratulations Colby and Family!

Some of you who read this blog on a regular basis have found your way over to Colby and Avery’s story. I know some of you read it pretty regularly and some of you have just visited once or twice. Well…big news this week: Colby came home! That’s right! After being born at just 25 weeks gestation, Colby has defied the odds and is now home with his family. Way to go Colby!!

When I read Scott’s posts last night I was just thrilled for Scott and Tracey and their older son, Evan. What a fantastic Christmas gift to receive. I’m sure they are enjoying having their little one in their own environment and all to themselves for a while.

Driving in to work this morning, I was thinking about them again and thinking how excited we were when we took Alaina home from the NICU and then again, when we finally got to bring Aaron and Brady home. Then I started to remember the flip side of bringing them home: I was an emotional wreck!

I think that the NICU staff (s) did a great job of preparing us to care for the children physically. What I was not prepared for was all the emotional and psychological stress that came along with taking home a premature baby.

The biggest adjustment was that we had no reassurances at home. When your child is in the NICU, regardless of how they are doing, they are hooked up to monitors 24/7. The monitors provide (often much needed) reassurance that your tiny baby is okay. As a NICU parent, you get very familiar with these monitors. You know exactly what your baby’s heart rate and oxygen level are at all times. Hell, I even knew the normal heart rate of the babies NEAR our babies. The monitors are just a part of NICU life and you get very used to having them there. But when the babies go home, all of a sudden, there are no monitors, no constant reassurance. I found when I took the babies home, I really missed having that steady confirmation that everything was the way it should be.

The other thing I had a hard time with after the NICU was “Mommy guilt”. (Fortunately, since I had gone through this with Alaina, I was able to work on correcting my approach to it when I brought the boys home.) Every day that I went to the NICU to visit Alaina, I hoped that we’d be getting the good news that she’d be going home. Then that day finally came. Of course, when she finally did come home, things did not go according to plan. There were times of incessant crying and there were problems nursing, etc. And there was frustration. As a new mother, I would end up crying because I felt guilty that I felt frustrated (confusing, right?)

“Isn’t having her home what you wanted?” I would think to myself. “How dare you feel anything less than ecstatic about this experience.”

Then I would bury the frustration, put on a happy face and pretend nothing was wrong. Ever. Not really a healthy approach. OF COURSE, there are going to be moments of frustration. And it was okay to feel them. In the retrospect, I wish I had let myself experience normal emotions instead of denying they existed. Just because your baby was premature doesn’t make you any less susceptible to feeling frustrated, or tired, or overwhelmed. In fact, you are probably MORE susceptible to feeling these things. Accepting that fact made all the difference the second time around.

I hope that Scott, Tracey and other parents of preemies are able to avoid some of those feelings that I had. Bringing home your baby is so special. And bringing home your baby after NICU time is even more special. Allowing yourself to accept help when needed, and feel emotions as they come will help parents to relax and enjoy having their little one(s) at home.

December pictures

I am a little behind this month and I am just now posting the link to the December photos. I had to share my favorites with you though:

Poor Aaron. You think I could have at least fixed his ear when I forced him to wear the hood.

I walked into the room to find my dog sound asleep in this position. She opened her eyes when I ran out for the camera...but didn't move.

World AIDS Day 2007

Just a little shout out to the sisters of Phi Omega Tau this World AIDS Day.

Back in '94 (wow, has it been that long?) when we were applying for recognition as an official Greek organization at SHU, we had to formally declare an objective or cause. As one of our founding sisters had just lost her brother to the disease, we chose AIDS Awareness. Years later, the active sisters are still working hard on campus to carry on the tradition we started.

Today, keep in mind that even small actions can lead to change. Get tested. Volunteer your time. Practice safe sex. Educate yourself and others. Shop(RED):

So Far, So Good

So far, that little girl in India is doing well. Let's all hope and pray she continues down this path to recovery.

Speechless

I don't have much to say except, Wow.

You know, while pregnant, I worried about a lot of things. One of things was the "vanishing twin" phenomenon. But I couldn't even have dreamt to worry about this:

Indian Girl Born With 8 Limbs Undergoes Risky Surgery
(Warning - the picture accompanying this story may be disturbing to some)

I can't imagine going through something like that. It just goes to show you can't take anything in life for granted.

Prematurity Awareness Month is coming

As we spend time with our children and see how healthy and happy they are, it is easy to forget that all three were born prematurely. We were very, very lucky that they were all born so strong, with no complications to speak of.

Sadly, this is not the case for everyone. One local family in particular has selflessly shared their story here: http://colbyandaverysstory.blogspot.com/ and via their support as Ambassadors for the March of Dimes (www.marchofdimes.org or www.walkamerica.com). I encourage you to read the blog - their story is amazing.

As we approach November - "Prematurity Awareness Month" - I ask you to consider making a donation directly this family. As you can imagine, not only has this been an emotional rollercoaster that few of us can truly empathize with, but also a financial burden on the family.

Just to give you an idea, our insurance (to date) has paid out $112,724.87 just for Aaron and Brady's time in the NICU. And we still have claims pending. This number does not include any of my medical expenses for the birth or pre-natal care. If our bill was that high, imagine what it must be for an extended stay for children born at 25 weeks....then factor in Mom and Dad's time out of work to be with their children.... I can't even imagine.

For more information on donating, visit this post or mail a check to Patrick Collins, ING, 45 Glastonbury Blvd, Glastonbury, CT 06033