Maybe City Living Would Be Better

I bet when you live in a city you do not have to call off your afternoon walk due to a black bear sighting your neighborhood.

Wait. Who are you?

My sons are identical. There are days when they look more like each other than other days. Lately, those days are coming more and more frequently. But even on their most identical days, I can tell them apart. I don't think it's mother's intuition; I really think there are the tiniest, subtlest differences between them that anyone who spends any significant amount of time with them would be able to distinguish. That being said, every once in a while, there are times where I have to stop and question: Who the hell am I holding?

This morning was one of those times.

Over the past few days I've noticed a funny line - like a crack - across the toenail on Aaron's right big toe. This morning, I was giving a bottle and cuddling Brady only to look down and notice his right big toenail. Same. Exact. Crack.

It was such a crazy coincidence that I had to stop and go back over the course of events of the last 12 hours to reassure myself I hadn't switched them at any point. Really, are identical twins supposed to be THAT identical? Maybe I'm in trouble. I guess we should go back to painting toenails just to be triple sure we always know which kid is which.

Croup sucks.

My poor Aaron was at the doctor just last week and diagnosed with an ear infection. After a full round of amoxycilin he didn't seem to be getting any better; just more irritable. Daddy took him back to the pedi and it turns out he had an ear infection in the other ear AND croup. My poor baby coughs until he gags or throws up. It's not pretty. But he's trying to be a trooper. He keeps playing and hardly ever complains:

I would say I see the end in sight but as he gets better with his new medications, all I can think is "When is it going to hit Brady?"

Bed time is the most fun time

Things I ONLY do when I'm pregnant

- Eat in the middle of the night
- Strike up conversations with toddlers belonging to complete strangers
- Cry happy tears. All. The. Time.
- Wear t-shirts with cute sayings on them
- Consume anything that comes from a McDonald's or a Burger King or a KFC (I still won't touch Taco Bell)
- Consider ice cream a legit source of calcium
- Avoid WebMd. Hypochondria + pregnancy = Panic
- Convince myself that I can make a living by working a part-time, home-based business
- Investigate new religions to possibly convert before new baby arrives
- Read Danielle Steele books
- Use gas station bathrooms

17p Injections Have Started

Last Monday I received my first progesterone injection. The nurse gave me my choice of big needle, fast shot or small needle, slow shot. I chose small needle, slow shot. And "slow" was about 7 seconds, so I'm glad I didn't opt for the larger needle to save time.

Today I went for my second injection which was given on my other side; apparently they will alternate with each appointment to avoid a build-up of scar tissue. So far, so good. I had been warned about feeling "itchy" at the injection site but I haven't experienced that yet.

Fingers crossed that these puppies work!

First Words! (sort of)

Brady is barely using "mama" in context, however, he makes my day (and night) with his correct use of the word "up". Yes, up. He crawls over, pulls himself up on my legs, puts his arms up and says "up". Okay, it's more like "uh" but still, it's the right sounds in the right context. I'll take it.

Aaron on the other hand, has chosen his favorite person in the household. He has still not even attempted "mama" but has full command of "Nay-na". That would be his word for "Alaina". It's about the cutest thing I've ever heard.

Until one of them starts calling for Mommy. Then THAT will be the cutest thing.

From The Mouth of Alaina

Dinnertime conversation...
Pepere (referencing Alaina's "sore back" after she helped to plant his garden): Alaina, how is your back feeling now?
Alaina: Oh...not well. (siiiiiighh......)


In the backyard...
Alaina is running with her running stick - a stick with a ribbon at the end of it. She is practically tripping over it.
Me: Why don't you hold it over your head while you run with it?
Alaina (stopping dead in her tracks): Oh no. Only four-year olds can do THAT, Mommy.


In the playroom...
Alaina: Mommy, you be the prince and I'll be the princess. Stand up! Let's dance!
Me: I can dance on my knees. That way we'll be the same height.
Alaina: No Mommy. Princes ALWAYS stand up. They don't know how to kneel.


I'm sure the things that come out of Alaina's mouth will stop being cute in a few short years. So I'll take these moments while I can.

Aaron's Special "First"

Aaron had a big milestone yesterday - his first kiss!

The daycare staff was all abuzz when I arrived and couldn't wait to tell me. Apparently he crawled right over to one of the "waddlers" - an older woman of 18 months! - pulled himself up on her and planted a big wet one on her cheek. I asked which child she was and was quite impressed with his good taste. He definitely picked the best looking girl in the group. Way to go, buddy!

Disturbing Things

Watching "Yo Gabba Gabba" with Alaina last night only to be confronted with "Biz's Beat of the Day". For those of you who aren't on the Yo Gabba Gabba scene, I'm referring to 90s one-hit wonder Biz Markie. Ugh. This was worse than the first time I saw They Might Be Giants on the Disney channel.

We Did It!

In yesterday's post over on HDYDI, I made big confession: I NEVER take the children anywhere alone.

I know, I know. The boys have been around for 10-months; how is that possible? Trust me, it just is. I've never been in the position to HAVE to go anywhere without another adult so I just haven't done it. Also, I'm terrified. And the work involved just packing everyone up and loading them into the car (while herding the dog off to her crate) is enough to deter anyone.

But that has all changed now my friends. I am happy to announce that for the first time last night, I successfully managed to be out of the house - alone - with all three children! We accepted a dinner invitation from Katie and her brood. Dinner time is about the worst time of day for my children. They are tired, they are hungry, they want their mommy and they will fight each other to get to their food/me. But, Katie and her kids are the only people I would feel comfortable accepting this invitation from - at least the first invitation. I knew that if the kids (or I) did lose it, she wouldn't be totally appalled and may, in fact, even invite us to do something else with them again. So, I decided it was time to just go for it.

I am happy to report that even though we all ate about a third of our normal dinner portions, we did ALL eat (myself included!). There were no meltdowns. In fact, there was laughter. My normally stranger-shy toddler was (gasp!) playing without keeping me within her direct line of vision. My sons allowed me to PUT THEM DOWN and WALK AWAY.

This was a great confidence boost. Now that the summer months are here, I am looking forward to finally getting out and about. So many things await: summer concerts on the town green, the park, the zoo. Now, if they'd only contribute to filling the gas tank, we'd be unstoppable.

Another Pale Summer

While I was at work this morning, my cell phone started vibrating on my desk. When this happens it is almost always daycare calling telling me that 1) we are out of milk/food/diapers/wipes and need to bring some more. Now. Or 2) someone is really sick and needs go home. Now.

But today it was my new doctor's office calling. I found this strange as I had just been there and I am not scheduled to return until June 6th. When I left they told me everything was fine. I better not have HIV....

When I answer the nurse sounded pleasantly surprised that I have taken her call and she doesn't have to leave a message. She informs me that the doctors have discussed my "case" and with my history of pre-term deliveries, I am now a top priority. I'm not sure why it took almost a week to move up the ladder of importance, but nonetheless, I'm happy for any special attention I may receive.

She proceeds to tell me that the consensus of the group is that I should start receiving weekly injections of 17P (17 alpha-hydroxyprogesterone caproate) starting at 16 weeks. Which would be...this week. Apparently this is the new recommended course of action to try and prevent a repeat pre-term delivery.

I agree that sounds good. Anything to keep baby cooking a little longer. But Daddy raises the red flag. Sure, all of our kids have done their fair share of NICU time but at what *real* consequence. What are the risks of this treatment? Are we setting ourselves up for something worse in the long-term.

Huh. Hadn't thought about that.

So, I hop back onto the phone, this time with my dedicated Aetna nurse/case-worker (a nice service for us "high-risk" preggo ladies) and address my concerns. She makes me feel better. Although she does inform me that a down-side for the mother while receiving these injections is a heightened sensitivity to sunlight. So I'll be spending another summer NOT getting a tan. Oh well. I'll share the children's SPF 1,000 sunscreen and use this as an excuse to wear a funky big hat.

She also told me that my coverage affords me an at-home teaching session, where a nurse can come to our house and show my daring husband how to inject me. That way, I don't have to go to the doctor every week for a 30-second injection. That is, until I have to go to the doctor every week for a cervix check. But, at least it will buy a month (or hopefully two) of convenience.

It looks like I'll start my injections on Thursday or Friday of this week. Let's all keep our fingers crossed that they will help me carry this baby longer than any of the others!

MOOOOOOOOOO

It's official: we are off formula! Woo-hoo!

Aaron and Brady are drinking milk like nobody's business. This is so nice for Mommy's wallet. Although, I am a little bummed that, unlike with formula, I cannot buy milk by the case on Diapers.com and have it shipped directly to my doorstep. Oh well. I guess a little planning ahead never killed anyone.

Happy Mother's Day!

Happy Mother's Day to my Mom, Grandma, Mother-in-Law, Godmother and the Godmothers of my three children! During my approximately 2.5 minutes of peace and quiet today, I reflected on my life and how very lucky I have been with the Mothering I have received and the love that my children are now receiving from all the special women in their lives.

What a great gift to be a mother. And as much as I complain about the lack of sleep, illnesses, and crying, I know EXACTLY how blessed I am and I wouldn't trade a second of it. My children truly are my greatest gifts.

Of course, I would be no where in all of this without my husband. Clearly he played a major part in my becoming a mother but there is no way I could be the mother I am without his love and support. I may appear to have my S%*t all together but the amount of work he does behind the scenes is what makes me look so good. And it affords my quality time laying around on the floor with my children instead of having to rush home to 22 loads of laundry and a meal to cook every day. I love you, B.

I hope all you moms out there had as great of a day as I just did. Kiss and hug your kids for me!

Concerts I Won't Be Attending

After last year's disappointment over missing the Police and Genesis reunion concerts, let's see, who I will not be seeing in concert THIS summer due to pregnancy and the inability to stand on my feet for any period of time:

Pearl Jam
Stone Temple Pilots (Reunion!)
R.E.M. - with Modest Mouse
New Kids on the Block (Reunion!)
Poison (probably not as fun anymore anyway now that Rock of Love has aired)

Oh, and just to be cruel, The Police are coming around "one last time" before going back into retirement. And they are coming to my area with Elvis Costello. Grr...

Last year I did manage to get to two nice, sit-down concerts with the boys in-utero: Aaron Lewis (of Staind) does a great acoustic show and I was able to see my boyfriend Josh Groban as well. Will there be a concert I can take my tummy to this year? Perhaps. Maybe the Jack Johnson show is low-key enough? If you have any other suggestions, throw them my way!

For Just $2 a Day...

I often sigh and whine at Daddy for his choices of outfits when he dresses Alaina in the morning. I do not appreciate coming home to find that he has taken her out looking like a homeless person. So I was humbled walking in the door at the end of the day with these two:

I swear, they do own shirts.

But this was a particularly rough day of drooling, messy eating, sweating and peeing at day care. The boys ran through their entire supply of back-up clothing. When I arrived to pick them up at 5:15, they looked like they had just gotten off the courts from a shirts vs. skins pick-up game.

They looked so cute, we let them go topless the rest of the night. They seemed to enjoy it. I believe Aaron even flexed at one point....

Josh Groban is Beautiful

MBFJG was named one of People Magazine's 100 Most Beautiful People!

At this time I'd like to send a big "I told you so" to my husband. Clearly other people agree that his "dorky" look IS appealing. Especially when paired with a voice like Josh's.

This never happens to me

As I have mentioned, I have no maternity clothes left from my previous pregnancies. So, I've been starting over (and, admittedly, I'm NOT sad about it!). So when I found this site that sells adorable t-shirts - www.CafePress.com - I promptly ordered one.

I waivered back and forth between a medium and a large. At the last moment, I went with the large to give myself room to grow. I was so excited to receive my t-shirt until I saw it was microscopic in size. Seriously, the smallest size L maternity t-shirt ever known to man arrived at my door.

But it's still adorable so I went back to www.CafePress.com to find out how to exchange this thing for the XL (grrr....). I filled out the online form and I PROMPTLY received THIS reply:

"Dear Cynthia,
I am sorry the item you received does not fit perfectly. I want you to be 100% satisfied with everything you purchase at CafePress.com. I am ordering you a replacement right away in the new size at no additional charge.

There is no need for a return! I do not want you to incur any additional shipping charges. Please keep the original as our way of saying thanks for shopping at CafePress.com.

If there is anything else I can do for you please let me know."

What? Are they serious? I can't tell you how this little email about a T-SHIRT just brightened my gloomy, rainy day. Needless to say I'll be bookmarking www.CafePress.com and using it in the future for all my cute t-shirt needs. And you should too. Just remember to order a size bigger than you think you should!

14 Week Appointment

Today was a bittersweet day. I left the OB who I trust and respect and actually like as a person which was sad. But I also met my new practice and got set up to deliver this baby in Massachusetts which makes me very happy.

I arrived 10 minutes late to my appointment due to the fact that I had to pull over and pee on my way there. I met the nurse and stepped on the scale to find out I have finally gained some weight (4 lbs in three weeks). We then tried to make sense of the stack of records I brought with me from Dr. M. Since there appeared to be no (chrono)logical order to them, this was a bit confusing. Finally we found the ultrasound results from April and put them on top. We could not find my bloodwork results, so I was sent to the lab to have that re-drawn. So, that makes HIV test #7. No one is more confident of their status than I at this point!

Anyway, I then met with the first of four doctors in the practice (and the only female). She was certainly competant and not unpleasant. But not the warmest person either. She flipped through my records and figured it would be much faster for me to give a verbal history directly to her which I did. At the end she asked if I wanted a vaginal birth this time and I told her YES, no question, and then held my breath for her response....

"That should be no problem. I don't see any reason why you couldn't do that. You're an excellent VBAC candidate." WHEW. Huge sigh of relief!

We ended the visit listening to the baby's heartbeat (perfect) and discussed next steps. I will go back in four weeks for my "big" ultrasound and to have my cervix measured. THAT'S JUNE 6TH if you're keeping track at home! Depending on what my cervix looks like, we'll talk about how often I should be seen from that point on.

As I walked out she said "I hope this will be a very boring pregnancy for you compared to last time." From your mouth to God's ears, lady!

Call me...Grandma?

They say that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. Well, then consider me VERY flattered that Alaina is also walking around the house these days "with a baby in my tummy, just like you, Mommy."

Yikes.

Yes, this startling announcement came on Sunday. I was sitting on the couch with my hand on my stomach. Alaina climbed up next to me, put her hand on her stomach and announced that she too, was with child.

Not only did she make this announcement, she ran with the fantasy for a good long while afterwards. She had doctor appointments and informed me that the baby has to stay inside for a while to "grow bigger and bigger". She had important shopping to do for a car seat and a crib.

Finally, the big moment arrived and the baby was born. (Thankfully said baby just appeared and we did not have to discuss how babies are born). Then it was on to feeding and "being very quiet" while the baby napped. "No more talking, Mommy. Don't wake up my baby."

I hope this is a sign of her excitement at being a big sister again. Not a sign of her impending teenaged-motherhood.

Just curious

How long does it usually take for a tooth to come in? My poor sons are chewing on everything. They are whining, drool machines. Aaron has one corner of one tooth poked through his lower gums. And that's it. It's been there for two days. When will the suffering (their and ours) finally end?

The Race to Walk

Recently Brady has started pulling up to the standing position using…anything*. Couch, body parts of people nearby and especially, the toy chest. He will then cruise around, occasionally moving from one piece of furniture to another.

Aaron…not so much.

So, here's the question: will Brady – who is so clearly TRYING to be upright and walk – actually take off first? Or will Aaron repeat his earlier strategy of letting his brother take the trouble to figure out how it all works…only to get up and beat him to the punch?

Time will tell.

Side note: *Brady also likes to pull up using the sliding glass doors to the former-porch-now-family-room. Occasionally at dinner we close those so we can keep them contained (and quiet) while we attempt to have a meal and conversation with Alaina. They're glass doors, people, we can see the kids. Don't judge. Anyway, when he pulls up, he resembles a mime acting like he's pulling up on something. Hysterical.